Does it matter? Do I matter?
February 16, 2023 5 min 36 sec read/listen
Let me start by saying this. You matter. What you bring to the world matters.
Look, I know there are days, maybe many days, that we question what we are bringing to the world, whether it be who we are in relationships, what we create in our art, what we bring through our work etc. We question if we are having impact. If what we are offering really matters. If we matter. It’s natural. It’s in our nature to want to have purpose and impact.
Can you trust me when I say it does matter? That you do?
And that we all go through this wondering, this doubting, this questioning – “Should I do something else, does this really matter, am I really making a difference?’
And then, friends, along comes a gift at the right time that touches your heart and reminds you that yes, even though you do not always know the ways you may touch another person’s life, you do touch them. Something you said, or did, mattered to someone. And that matters.
This is a story about such a gift that came my way this week.
A woman I coached for 3 months 1:1, was about to start a 6-month private coaching journey with me, to expand on the work we had just done together.
Her deepest work was with her relationship she had – or didn’t have -with herself. Our work together was to develop a practice for her to turn toward herself rather than against, to choose compassion and tenderness for the younger, harmed old parts of herself – parts of herself she had for so long been rejecting or trying to ignore.
A practice to support her reclaiming her voice, going to her heart for guidance and showing up authentically to her life. More than anything she wanted to like, and trust, and love herself.
She was working so hard, so committed to her journey back to her own self. Her desire and longing for this reminded me of the desire and longing I had back when I started my own path home to myself, through this practice of gentle self-connection.
A week ago, she was t-boned by another car and rushed to the trauma unit with extensive though thankfully – so thankfully – non life threatening injuries. She is still in the hospital and will be for about another week recovering and undergoing some more tests to make sure she truly is all good to go.
The other day, in the sort of quiet vulnerable tone of voice you might expect one to have who has just endured such a trauma, she left me this message from her hospital bed and with her permission, I’m sharing it with you today.
Her message went like this:
“Hi Jenny (she, my mother and my best friends mother are the only people in my life who call me that)
“I’m leaving you this message because I just want to say, here is how important and meaningful the work that you do as a coach, is. And the work that we have done together is.”
She goes on:
“I found myself three days into being here in the hospital, confused, drugged, hurting and then I found myself with my hand on my heart, like we have been doing in our work, telling my little one that I was okay, that I was safe, that I was protected, that I was there, that I could hear her, that I was listening to her and that we were in good hands, and that we were loved, and that we were blessed.”
Can I just share with you, listener, that for this client, this is galaxies from where she used to be with herself and hearing her, as I sat in my car listening to her message, I welled up. My heart felt so full. So honoured.
She continued:
“It was so interesting to keep holding myself like that in the midst of this concussion and brokenness and hurt and confusion….and I wanted you to know that even through a car crash, your work (she was crying through this)…your work was gently walking me and holding me through. So, thank you for that and also, (she giggled here) I thank me for listening.”
She is right, she can and she must thank herself for being so open to the work, for listening, for choosing her own heart and choosing love.
As she believes I gifted her through my work as a coach, I believe she gifted me with her trust, her willingness, her commitment, and this beautiful share from her hospital bed.
We may never know how we touch another person’s life. What thing we may have said, or did that reached so deeply into their hearts, they are changed in some way forever in their choices, their thoughts perhaps…who knows.
The not knowing, to me, is where the magic is. We give, we offer, we share, we be, ideally from a place of love within ourselves because it’s our nature, and we let it go out into the world, trusting somehow that it – that we – do indeed matter.
I’m Jenn. I’m a professional actor, a writer, a self-connection guide for women, and a believer in magic. We are all in this together. Trust in who you are and what you bring to this world Friends. It all matters. It all belongs.
With you on the journey,
Jenn
Photography by Omer Salom with permission from @Unsplash
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